When I was on knees and elbows pushing out Everly and tearing wide open while N and 4 other women watched all my sense of privacy, bashfulness and desire to be ladylike went out the window.

After delivery many unexpected farts were heard coming from me. They were shocking to me because I couldn’t feel them coming and I certainly couldn’t hold them back after a rectal sphincter tear. By the way Krystal, I didn’t poop during delivery (LOL). It took several days following labor for the poop to come.

Following labor I was inundated with questions about and inspections of my vagina, anus, boobs. Had I pooped yet, did it hurt? When was the last time I peed, did it sting? Are the crotchsicles working, how is the swelling etc.

Then there are the baby bodily functions to discuss too. What color is baby’s poop, is she peeing to? Is the poop seedy or runny? Is she having gas and does she burp often? Has she been spitting up?

Basically I am not shy about bodily functions anymore! I’ve shared that my ass hurts on several occasions and have made N’s family uncomfortable I am sure. Just the other day after pooping I noticed only blood on the toilet paper when I wiped so I called to N to inspect the stitches with me. I was sure I ripped one somehow but he assured me it was still in place despite the separating and bleeding.

Back on Tuesday I called N to come in and help me clip off the tail to my stitches that was jabbing the inside of my vagina. It was all this extra from the stitches just hanging out down there. Naturally I didn’t want to clip it off myself because it’s a bit delicate down there and I didn’t have a good view of what I was doing.

He’s a trooper and has no problem checking the damage and helping me down there. He hates thinking about and seeing the awful damage down there though. It really looks much worse than it is and honestly I would rather tear open naturally than have a labor induction or a c-section.

Anyway, back to bodily functions… When Everly poops man it is loud! Breastfed babies have much softer stools. Almost like diarrhea with some stringy chunks and seeds. It is normal for them, I am not sure if the explosive fart sounds are normal though. If you need a visual check out this video.

The sharts (shit & farts) sure are amusing us though. I mean you can hear her pooping from the next room, she has the “poop grunt” down pat and the farts/ squirts are insanely explosive! I mean she doesn’t even really cry as loud as she sharts. We positively reinforce her pooping and she smiles afterward so I guess it is all good.

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