personal stories pregnancy

More reflections and a new belly shot to share…

Found a quote that basically sums up the baby shower situation and our feelings:

Your assumptions are your windows on the world. Scrub them off every once in a while, or the light won’t come in -Alan Alda

I am still getting many messages about the shower turnout and it seems I may have not clearly articulated things. We were hurt and disappointed, yes, but we aren’t letting it all shut us down. Yeah, it would be so easy to just eliminate tons of people from our lives but we want to avoid placing blame or finger pointing.

The point for us was to express our feelings and work through them not to blame others. We were hurt, felt let down by many and were sad. The thing about feelings is that they are the result of many variables right?

Our feelings were probably somewhat influenced by our expectations of those close family and friends. Our feelings were also probably influenced by our assumptions made regarding how others are supposed to act based on proper shower etiquette. Our feelings were also influenced by the actions of many others (shower turnout, the lack of response by others to the invitations and so on)… To just focus on one variable would be silly since so many played in to our resulting feelings.

So, we’ve openly expressed our feelings and we don’t expect others to take responsibility for them. We do appriciate everyone who has reached out to apologize or to clear up any misunderstandings about the shower and their attendance.

Right now we are just focusing on all the blessings we have in those who have shared in our special time in whatever way they could. We aren’t cutting people out of our lives so to speak. We are aware of the fact that we do waste much time and energy in the wrong places with those who will never reciprocate the sentiments.

We do think it is reasonable to redirect our attentions and to focus on those who have warmed our hearts as opposed to focusing on those people whom we think should be involved in this special life event. This doesn’t mean we are shunning anyone, just means we wont be pouring as much effort, time and energy in to trying to get them to care. Hope that makes sense.


On to brighter topics! Look who is exploding with baby belly:

Can ones belly button come undone while pregnant? I think mine might! He, he….

I am pretty sure I am weighing in at about 133 right now (if my home scale isn’t way wrong). I’ve got another silly prenatal appointment with the OBGYN on Friday so I’ll have an update on my weight at that time. Oh and tomorrow marks the beginning of my 33rd week of pregnancy.

Last night N said he started laughing to himself while walking behind me. I guess it seems like I am not pregnant from behind but I am totally waddling when I walk, which looks silly since you can’t detect the pregnancy from behind… Funny, I haven’t felt like I am waddling all that much but I guess I am just used to it.

Also, getting myself up and down these days is getting WAY harder! N now has to use 2 hands to hoist me up out of bed in the morning and I am getting pretty close to not being able to get myself out of the bath tub on my own… LOL. Good times!

<p>A city girl turned farmer. Yes women do farm ;) Owner and operator of direct to consumer, Ryder Family Farm in Southern Illinois.<br /> Wearing many hats I'm also a mother to 3, a wife, a yogi, a farmer, a 4-H & Girl Scout leader & hospitality manager.</p>

0 thoughts on “More reflections and a new belly shot to share…

  1. It’s funny, minutes before I read this post, I was wandering through my kitchen when a little “post it” caught my eye. Written in my own chicken scrawl were three little words. “Assumptions aren’t facts.”

  2. Very Cute belly! By the way, 8 weeks post partum, and that line still hasn’t gone away! Its cute while pregnant, but sooo not cute post pregnancy. I’m hoping it fades soon! Oh, and my ending weight was 128! Can you imagine me 128! I can’t believe I ever weighed that much! But thankfully after a 6 pound baby and at my 6 week check up I only needed to loose 7 pounds to get down to my pre-pregnancy weight! (I’m soo thankful!) ๐Ÿ™‚
    Oh and no stretch marks!!! ๐Ÿ™‚ It looks like you won’t get any either!! ๐Ÿ™‚

    Heather Joness last blog post..8 weeks Old and already working!

    1. Heather,
      I heard from a few moms that the line never went away… ๐Ÿ˜ฎ I really hope that is not the case. My belly button is all stretched out of whack, hoping it too goes back in. You are right, so far no sign of stretchmarks! Yay.

      I can’t believe I’ve already gained 33 pounds and I’ve got several weeks still to go still! My weight gain is not slowing down either… I guess that means Tater is growing just fine.

      Are you breastfeeding? I am planning to so I am not too worried about dropping the extra weight right after the delivery, just before I’ve got to squeeze in to my wedding dress! LOL. Who knows how far off that will be…

  3. I didn’t realize how tiny my tummy was until I saw yours. I must be having a midget – I know it. Now I know why no one believes me when I tell them I am 32 weeks pregnant. You on the other hand look incredible and perfectly 33 weeks! It’s all baby there! SO CUTE!!!! I wish I could model cute shorts like that!

    So sorry about the shower, you’re right to move on. If it makes you feel any better, I am pretty sure the same will happen to me too. It’s not at all the same as when I got married.

    Janelles last blog post..The Wifebeaters

  4. You really don’t look pg from the back… I bet you do walk “different” than N is used to! You are all baby! Thanks for sharing the pics.

  5. You don’t look pregnant from behind-I hate you, lol!

    Keep your eyes open…I bought some stuff off of your target registry and one item was back ordered and it is now being sent to you-finally! I was so worried it would not make it…not that you couldn’t live without the things I bought for you!

  6. For lack of better words….Im glad your processing all of the junk that went down well. I love you!

    I LOVE THE BELLY!!!!!!! So envious of how you dont even look pregnant in the back. I bet people are so shocked….they check you out from behind and then you turn to the side and WHOA! LOL!

  7. Yep I’m breastfeeding! Its the best thing in the world, except when your son decides he wants to suddenly look at something and turns his head and tries to take your nipple with it! Soo not fun!! ๐Ÿ˜‰ Thats scary about the line! (Yikes)! Well you are looking good, I’m sure you will drop down like me real fast! ๐Ÿ˜‰

    Heathers last blog post..8 weeks Old and already working!

  8. Great quote by Alan Alda – sounds like you guys have a healthy attitude and frame of mind about the whole situation and holy hell – you swallowed a cantaloupe! ๐Ÿ˜‰ Hugs to you!

    teenis last blog post..The Name Is

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